Parents Tell Trans Teen Not To Come Out To Their Extended Family Until After The Vacation

Parents Tell Trans Teen Not To Come Out To Their Extended Family Until After The Vacation

No matter if you’re LGBTQ+ or not, being able to be your authentic, true self is life-affirming. Try it – it might change your life.

However, it’s a fact that trans and nonbinary people have a hard time with being their authentic selves, mostly due to fears that they won’t be accepted by their closest family and friends. And, unfortunately, oftentimes, when they do come out, they’re propelled to stay out.

Case in point, one Reddit user recently decided to take it to the popular Am I The A-hole subreddit and share their story to get some feedback.

The original poster asked if they were the a-hole for not letting their trans daughter come out to their extended family until after their vacation.

The parent shared that their 17-year-old daughter is transgender, but she’s currently only out to her immediate family. So, the mom and dad do call her by her preferred name and use the right pronouns for hr, but nobody else in the family knows that she’s trans, so they refer to her by her deadname and with he/him pronouns. So far, it’s been bearable for her, but now the family is going on a week-long vacation with some of their relatives, and they’re all sharing a house. Because of this, the OPs daughter will be referred to be her deadname and pronouns, and she’ll be presented as male. Expectedly, she has expressed her discontent with this, and she’s even considering not going to the vacation.

The OP and her husband both agree that their daughter should wait only after the vacation is finished to come out because she’s worried that it won’t be enough time for them to fully understand that their daughter is trans.

Before you make a judgment, we invite you to check out the full story below.

Most people voted that the OP is, in fact, the a-hole here, and that she should let her daughter come out as she pleases. But what do you think? What would you do if you were in a similar situation? Feel free to tell us in the comments.


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